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Ali Jackson had been single for about four years, and like so many women, felt burned out on dating apps. Swiping had become a monotonous routine, something to do when she was bored. So Jackson decided to try something novel: Meet people in person. Initially, Jackson signed up for singles mixers and speed dating parties but found she had more fun at non-dating get-togethers, like adult summer camp and run club.
It was at one of these social gatherings, hosted by a friend on the periphery of her friend circle, where Jackson met her now-boyfriend. Her only intention going into the event was simply to talk to people. Finding romance was a bonus. Others bemoan the jarring nature of going from strangers to romantic interests within days. Although would-be lovers have, for nearly all of existence, found other ways to meet, some singles β especially ones whose only dating experience has been digitally mediated β may find their in-person flirting skills lacking.
The key to connecting with someone in the flesh, experts say, is to focus on quality conversations with everyone you meet and not to take rejection personally. One of the biggest challenges to in-person dating is not knowing where to meet people. Think of an activity you like to do and find a club or gathering around that pursuit, says relationship expert Susan Winter. Uncross your arms, take off your headphones, and make eye contact.
These can be one-offs, like a concert, or a routine event, like an amateur softball league. Take off those headphones, too. Small groups of two or three are great, Jackson says. The larger the crew, the less likely a stranger will approach you. Think twice about attempting to date a coworker.
