Well, the first date is easy. You know basically nothing about this person, so even if it turns out that you have zero in common, you can get through a few drinks or dinner by talking about your first pet or whatever. Actually, that would be boring. Movies, talk about movies. Yes, bowling. Because the many factors that comprise a bowling outing can pretty much clarify if your date is a fun person you want to continue hanging out with or someone who will either slowly or quickly turn into a psycho.
First and foremost, this is a date and dates should be fun. Conveniently, bowling is fun, even if you suck at it. And beer is fun. Pun intended, obviously. But back to learning if your date is a monster or not. Bowling is a window to the soul. Seeing how someone reacts to winning and losing is hugely important. How well does your date handle wearing bowling shoes? Do they admit that they look sorta ridiculous?
Does your date look amazing in bowling shoes? Then they must be some sort of supermodel, so congrats, but that could make you feel insecure over time. What is their sock situation? Arthur George socks by Rob Kardashian? Dear God. Do they not wear socks? That seems bold…too bold. Especially with shoes that have been worn by a whole bunch of other people.
Do they choose a name other than their own to put on the screen? This is complicated. Because of course you love a Big Lebowski reference, but you must tread lightly. One mention is good. Also keep track of how many White Russians they drink. That could go south later. In the bedroom. In the southern hemisphere of their body. Great, an older person cared enough about them at some point in their life to teach them good form!
Good back leg work? They care about details. Between the legs? I think the implications there are obvious and probably not positive. Like his arm is a hockey stick. So that was useful.
