Welcome to Doing It , a column where sex educator Varuna Srinivasan explores the deep connections between sex and emotions. This month, they speak with people in polycules about what this type of polyamorous relationship is really like. Have a question or story idea for Dr.
Submit it here. Even I was quite unaware of this concept until a barrage of features on polycules and the dynamics involved in them took over The Discourse this year. Michelle Hy, polyamory expert and founder of the website Polyamorous While Asian , defines polyamory as the capacity to have multiple simultaneous intimate relationships and a polycule a way to vaguely refer to the web of these multiple relationshipsβboth platonic and romantic.
For example, say you have a boyfriend who has a girlfriend who has another partner. You would move from polyamory to polycule status if you are all regularly spending time together.
While you wouldn't necessarily all be involved with each other romantically or sexually, all members of a polycule must be platonically involved to some extent. A polycule usually involves at least three people, but there is technically no upper limit to how many people one can containβthe New York Times recently profiled a person polycule. Polycules often begin when two people who serve as each other's primary partners open their relationship to involve other people.
Primary partners are usually those who are married, have children together, or have designated their relationship as the originating point from which a polycule is formed. They can share child care duties, share housekeeping responsibilities, run errands for one another, and celebrate important milestones together. Although polycules have been getting a lot of buzz in , Hy confirms that this type of communal living is nothing new, particularly in the queer community.
