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Republished from Midwestern Marx. Clauss is interrogated by the Soviet police. Below are some excerpts from the conversation:. You see I have a very busy night tonight. Soviet Police 1: He was found attempting to hide in a chimney. Soviet Police 2: Chimney? What were you doing in Russian airspace? Santa: I've already told you⦠Santa gets slapped : Ho, ho, ho That was naughty.
Soviet Police: We found a list of names. Santa: Ah my list. Soviet Police: These are American spies? Santa: No, no⦠Soviet Police: There was also a second list. Santa: Oh you don't want to be on that list. Soviet Police: You plan to kill these people. Santa: No, no, they just get a bad present⦠It used to be a bag of coal⦠but the whole climate change thing Soviet Police: We intercepted a communication from one of his assets.
Santa: No it's not code. Soviet Police: Then who is Santa? Santa: That's me. Soviet Police: You said your name was Father Christmas. Santa: Yes, I'm known by very many names.
Soviet Police: So you are spy? How do you know my children's names? What are you doing in Russia? Santa: Presents, I deliver presents. Soviet Police: Presents? For who? Santa: Well, to all the children in the world.
Soviet Police: All the children in the world? In return for what? Santa: Well, nothing. Soviet Police: Nothing? You are communist? Santa: Da Yes β¦ Why do you think I wear red comrade? This captures wonderfully the gap between reality and the values and narratives enunciated by the liberal capitalist world.